We’ve been adhering to social distancing and shelter-in-place for over 50 days now. This is a snapshot of what our experience has been like and how we’re processing.
FYI, Justin wrote this post.
A General Overview of Day-to-Day Life
Things in Berlin have been relatively calm compared to other major cities in Europe and around the world. On Wednesday, the German government made an announcement that the first phase of the pandemic was behind us. Slowly, small businesses are beginning to open with limits on the number of customers and the requirement that everyone must wear a mask. Playgrounds have opened back up this week. Minor adjustments are continuing to be made in order to scale up (or down) based on the infection curve.
As we reach this milestone — although I think we can all agree that it feels like we’ve been at home FOREVER, we are reflecting and wanted to share an update on what’s been OK, and what’s been more challenging.
The Things That Have Been OK
Work
Paige and I are both working full-time. We are fortunate to have jobs — even if they are stressful at this time. A few of the nonprofits I work with are scrambling to support their constituents. Paige’s company laid off staff and reduced hours for employees because new investments in start-ups aren’t expected to come. She is taking on more responsibility as a result of a smaller team.
Working from home has not been as difficult for us because
a) we don’t have kids
b) we’ve both worked from home together our last few months in Oakland and when we lived in Zagreb this past summer. We got pretty good at it.
Ironically, Tessa is probably the one who is most annoyed with our working from home. She spent three days a week at Paige’s work and two days a week with me at my co-working space. Tessa misses seeing people besides us, and this photo captures her feelings about spending so much time with just us. Meanwhile, Gizmo seems happy we’re here and is more snugly (when not being an a-hole).
Health Care System
The health care system in Berlin (and Germany) has held up very well. Testing is available. And if we ever need to be tested, there is a place about two blocks away that we could go.
There are plenty of masks and hospitals are not running out of personal protective gear at this time. There are enough resources that folks have been putting cloth masks on the statues in our neighborhood.
Food
There were some food shortages the first Friday-Tuesday when it was clear the government was going to mandate that non-essential workers stay home. But after that, you could find anything you needed (except yeast for all that stress-baking). While some stores may run out toilet paper near the end of the day, you can find it pretty easily. We’ve lucky to live within a 10-minute walk of six grocery stores, so if a store has run out of something, we can run in and grab it elsewhere.
We haven’t had time to explore too many new recipes. We made focaccia one weekend and we’ve been making curry and lentil dishes once a week which is new for our rotation.
Springtime
Springtime in Berlin is beautiful! We had no idea there were so many cherry blossom trees in our neighborhood. Obviously, we wish we could see more of the city, but we’ve limited outings to walks with Tessa. We don’t have a car and haven’t been on public transit during the last 50 days, so we’ve definitely gotten to know the streets and parks in our neighborhood. These are a few of our favorite photos during that time.
Chatting With Friends and Family
Our isolation in Berlin has been difficult (more on this below). We’ve made a few friends here through work and Democrats Abroad, but we haven’t been able to see them. So, we’ve been video chatting with friends and family more often. And this has been the least terrible aspect of COVID-19. Being able to catch-up with friends has been very grounding. It’s been SO NICE to see friendly faces, provide space for parents to vent about the challenges of having their kids at home, have some laughs, and try to get our pets to say hi to one another.
The Things That Have Been Challenging
A quick caveat — we have our health, we have jobs, we’re financially secure, we can go outside, we have pets to keep us company. We’re doing better than 99% of the people in the world and want to acknowledge that. With that said, these are some of the things we have found more challenging during this time.
Language
There are A LOT of people that speak English in Berlin. We’re pretty lucky to have ended up in this city, all things considered. However, announcements and signage are in German. And while we’ve been trying to learn German, we’re not very good. Most businesses that are open now have signs in their window with strict procedures about how to shop in their store. It’s a bit intimidating to try to figure this out.
I had one experience where a grocery store employee was standing in front of their store, giving everyone instructions on how to shop in their store. I had no idea what he was saying, so I left.
Canceled Plans
One of the primary reasons we embarked on this journey was to see more of the world. While we’ve been disappointed with having to cancel some travel, we know it’s been more difficult on friends and family that have had to cancel their visiting us. Many of our favorite moments in the last year were visits from loved ones or traveling to meet them in other parts of Europe.
The following visits have already been canceled/postponed:
- Meeting a friend in Amsterdam when he was there for a work conference
- Paige’s parents visiting Berlin (which was supposed to be this week)
- Meeting friends in Budapest who were starting a cruise there
- Having a friend stay with us in Berlin
We know this has been harder on those coming to visit. And we’ve been equally saddened at the missed opportunity to see them.
Physical Health
We’ve been trying our best to maintain some level of physical activity. This has been more challenging for Paige as she went to the gym 4–5 days a week. In fact, she went to the gym one of the last days before they closed. Home workouts don’t have the same physical or mental rewards for her.
Before COVID-19, I would play basketball by myself for a cardio workout. If I played with others, I know that I risk injuring myself, so it’s been a solo activity. With the playgrounds closed, I had to stop that activity. I thought I had outsmarted the Berlin government by going to an open-air court in Mauerpark that doesn’t have a playground attached. I thought, ‘I’ll be fine because I’m playing by myself.’ However, people must have had the same idea because the city had removed the rim from the basket.
However, I am running more often, which has been positive for my mental health. Running can be a bit stressful, as it is challenging to avoid people on the street, depending on what time I go out. While some of the landmarks in Berlin are empty (pictures below), the neighborhoods are busy with people running errands or getting their kids outside. Our district has one of the highest concentrations of kids per square km in all of Europe, so I try to be mindful of giving parents with strollers and little ones on razor scooters plenty of space.
Mental Health
Like most people, this has been challenging for our mental health. Speaking for both of us — we’ve had good days and bad days. We’ve been able to build in some habits and routines that make it less likely that we’ll have bad days. But, they still happen.
Speaking for me personally, I’ve struggled with the loss of control, the concern that our physical distance has made the COVID-19 experience more difficult for family/friends, and anxiety over ensuring that I’m supporting my colleagues and the nonprofits I work with.
This manifests itself in a variety of ways. Multiple times I’ve been walking Tessa listening to a podcast and unexpectedly started crying. Sometimes it’s due to the content on a podcast, and sometimes it’s something that I’ve been thinking about on my own. I’m also getting angrier at people who are not sharing sidewalks or adhering to social distancing. This is a situation where the lack of confidence in my German language skills helps me; if I were in the US, I would make a snarky comment to the individual. Here, I just glare and wave my arms to attempt to communicate, “Do you need to take up the whole sidewalk?!?!”. They probably think I’m trying to wave away a bee.
I saw a therapist the last couple of years in Oakland and feel like COVID-19 is pressing on all of the areas that I tried to do work on. I’ve compared it to a major rainstorm after you’ve tried to fix a leaky roof. Some places have held up great! And there are some places with water seeping through that need more work.
The most important mental health step that I’ve taken in the last 50 days is when I have a bad day, I have stopped internalizing it and beating myself up. Some days are going to be a struggle. That’s OK. I, like everyone else, am doing the best I can.
Lack of Hair Cuts
This is the least important thing in the world right now. However, I definitely need a hair cut.
Love you all so much. Hope you’re staying healthy — physically and mentally.
